I feel bad that I’ve been away from blogging on here for Ryu’s sake and for my sake trying to organize everything on here. Aside from Ryu misplacing the battery to my camera being the reason why I haven’t posted there’s been a lot of problems at home. I’m not quite sure if this would be the perfect place to share all of this considering this blog is mainly about Ryu. However, I think that because this does involve Ryu I thought that it might be sort of soothing to share with you all what’s been going on.

I’m not sure how many of you are single parents out there, but it sure is hard to be new to the idea of being one. Ryu’s father and I have been separated for a good 6-7 mo. now and well we’re trying to make the best out of it. The hardest part of this all is we still do live together for financial reasons. At this moment we’ve decided (or at least he did) that he’s going to venture off within the next 3 months and to pretty much get myself ready to do things on my own. We’re trying to figure out how we’re going to divide the time for Ryu because this just seems far worst than a normal breakup or divorce. Having any type of separation with children involved makes the situation much more difficult. I think in the beginning of it all I was being unreasonable to give Romeo and type of custody to see his son due to my pain and selfishness. To make a long story short, I gave in and he and I are trying to be civil and it takes baby steps to be friends. I think we’re slowly getting there, but of course it took a lot from my part to calm down and look at it from a realistic point of view. I can’t be selfish at least not when it comes to my son. As much as I want to take him away from his father I have absolutely no reason to. Romeo’s a great dad and he will continue to remain and be in Ryu’s life and in my life. Therefore, being friends would be the easiest way to do so.

At this point I’ve got to figure out what typical single parents do:

  • Job?
  • Housing?
  • Transportation?
  • Childcare?
  • Expenses?

I have to think about all of that in a span of 3 months. I need to buckle down and start somewhere. Things might not be perfect, but the holidays are coming up. I need to make the best out of this difficult situation for my son. It’s not his fault his parents aren’t meant to be together and can’t seem to find a solid ground together. However, what his parents can provide is two happy homes that’s going to love him twice as much!

If you all relate or need some advice I’d love to talk. I’d love to know what other single mommies out there are doing. How they got through tough times alone?


Flashback Friday

This is a good post for Fridays due to the fact that lately I’ve been lagging on posting anything. This actually works out in my favor and I’ll be able to just strictly blog about Ryu all day long. If you’re wondering I do have tons of pictures of Ryu waiting, but I still have to edit them and  post them up.

Alright, these pictures aren’t really that old. They were taken sometime this month. However, I haven’t really gotten around to posting them due to me being sick and busy the last couple weeks. Can you all believe it’s already the end of October? Another new month is about to start and seriously I have no idea where the time’s gone by? I feel like I’m still missing out on some of the good or even bad days Ryu has. My baby is just growing up so fast and I’m not quite sure I’m ready for the small changes that has been happening here and there.

If there’s one thing I love it’s taking pictures of Ryu when were home. I feel like he’s more in his comfort zone and the great part about it is that he absolutely loves getting his picture taken. He seems to just sit there and pose for the camera. It’s also such a treat for him when you show him his pictures. He lights up like a Christmas tree and absolutely giggles to his own photos. Ryu I hope you appreciate being able to look back at your hundreds of pictures when you get older. You’re a wonderful little boy, what makes it all even better is that you’re all mine.

Like Nani’s recent post for her “Flashback Friday” she talks about being Sae being able to fit in an old sweater. The shirt Ryu is wearing in this picture was given to him by my sister (aunt/godmother) sometime earlier this year. The shirt was actually meant for 9 mo. old infant. I noticed that majority of Ryu’s shirts are for infants around 6-9 mo. I think it’s about that time we take Ryu shopping, and I can’t wait til Black Friday cause I’m going to make it a point that it’s Ryu’s shopping day. It’s about time we upgrade his wardrobe to much more flattering and form fitting clothes rather than clothes his tummy is sticking out of, haha. I love this shirt on Ryu, but I know I’ll have to part with this shirt since he’s just getting way too old for it. Anyway, enjoy some of the photos I took of Ryu at home wearing this Paul Frank top.

Just those rainy days..

This was taken sometime in the beginning of October. I never really got around to posting it until now. I love Ryu, and I absolutely love the outfit he’s wearing thanks to Nani for the windbreaker; Mykka for the Mickey sweater.

Daddy loves him so much

Windbreaker from Baby GAP, Mickey sweater from H&M, Pants from Walmart, and Shoes from Payless

There’s always gotta be at least one shot w. mommy.


Ryu in Pink.

Lately, I’ve been taking pictures of Ryu at home. When I get home in the evening I think to myself, why not take pictures of Ryu. It doesn’t matter if he’s just home or if we’re not doing anything special. I realized that everyday Ryu’s changing before our eyes, and we’re too busy to notice his slight changes. I’m sure you other parents out there can relate to what I’m talking about. I honestly didn’t realize the changes in Ryu until I looked at some pictures at work today. It’s almost like he wasn’t the same baby that I gave birth to. His features are starting to really show and his face is starting to change as each day passes by. Sooner or later he’s going to be starting school and I’m going to ask myself where did the time go?

Btw, I’m absolutely loving this program I’m using to edit Ryu’s pictures. I honestly don’t care that they’re not the originals off the camera. I think it adds extra touch to the images. I’m also planning in investing in a better DSLR overtime. My SLR is crap now, but you can see that it’s just doing the job fine for me for the time being. I’m not going to complain because these can get really pricey.

Tank from some small shop (grandmother bought it), Diaper is Huggies, lol.

I’m not going to lie being new to this parenting still is crazy to me. There are still a lot that I’ve got to learn and this little man of mine here drives me insane. Although, I can’t help but love him more and more each day. When Romeo and I come home he just knows to run to us and give us the biggest kiss and hug ever! He’s absolutely my world; our world. We wouldn’t really be who we are if it weren’t for Ryu entering our lives.

Ryu did a photoshoot a couple days ago, but his Godparents still need to edit the pictures. I also took a couple pictures that I’ll probably share sometime next week. Have a great weekend!

Random Photo Op.

I was playing around with my crappy SLR, and realized not only am I bad at taking pictures of Ryu, but I’m also horrible at photo editing. Obviously with that comes skill, but I feel like I just don’t have the eye for this sort of hobby. It’s something I badly want to learn, but I know it’s experience and just equipment. Hopefully if I keep up just practicing I’ll sort of get a bit better with time. I’m still trying to find new programs to play around with so hopefully I can manage with what I have.

I did virtually realize that I completely suck at editing.. after looking at these pictures I was sort of disappointed. Oh, well I guess let’s see what lightroom can do for me. I’m popping that sucker in once I get home. I love following Nani’s blog because all she talks about her Sae. She also runs great pictures on her site of Sae and I’m envious of how well they turn out!

These are pictures taken at home of Ryu and I. I was bored and decided it was time to take out the crappy SLR and just play around with it. I told myself, crappy pictures or not the quality of the pictures of this camera was better than my regular digital camera. I also told myself that I needed to start taking pictures of Ryu on the regular and just get myself used to it. I realized that once I started doing that it almost because second nature for me to capture everything Ryu was doing. To be honest there were times I felt like a silly tourist, but it’s worth it in the end once Ryu get’s to see these pictures. Again, forgive me for the lack of talent I have when it comes to photo editing.

It’s actually quite funny because as I was taking pictures of Ryu I noticed that he would pose for the camera once in a while. It’s like he understands that I’m taking pictures of him and he honestly didn’t seem to mind me snapping away. I plan to do more random photos like these of Ryu and I was thinking of starting my “baby fashion” choices, but I’m not quite sure where I’m planning to blog that at.

Btw, my little man has his first photoshoot tomorrow with his Godparents who happen to be amateur photographers. I’m quite excited actually because it’s going to be so fun and so cute of Ryu. I’ve literally waited for a whole year for his Godparents to finally organize a shoot. I guess what makes it even better is that it’s an actual shoot just for Ryu. I’m definitely going to be taking my own pictures behind the scenes!

Ryu’s 1st Bath

After bringing Ryu home we were advised to wait a couple weeks until giving Ryu his first bath. I guess different MD’s. advise differently for different children. However, I took the hospital’s suggestion and waited to do so. If anything we actually waited until Ryu’s umbilical cord fell off. I’m not sure if it has anything to do with Filipino beliefs, but my grandmother and mother suggested that I waited as well. I guess so that Ryu doesn’t get sick and he gets used to the world at first. I was excited to give Ryu his first bath. Not that Ryu stunk or anything, but I’m sure all that gunk from being inside of me and just his skin irritation he was going to be relieved of all that funk.

I tried using pictures that censored Ryu’s tidbits since there are some odd, weird, nasty, pedo’s out there. Some weird people that actually get off of a child’s innocence. Anyway, back to what I was saying by looking at some of the pictures you probably could see some of Ryu’s eczema on his arms. He also had such bad scaly skin that was waiting to just fall off. I was very happy to pretty much scratch that off for him and just clean him off.

Here’s a video of Ryu and his first bath. Unfortunately, when I uploaded the video I sort of forgot to rotate it. I apologize for that inconvenience.

Ryu also had his circumcision the day after he was born. He was recovering and there was patches of skin pealing from his groin. I was trying to constantly wet it with water so that the skin would just fall off rather than us using the rag and rubbing it off. I think that would be far too painful and irritating to him.